Today is one of those days I have too much time to myself. Nothing explicit happened, but I feel depressed all of a sudden.
Why do I feel like people by my side are leaving me one by one? Some physically and some emotionally.
Posted by peironggg on April 18, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/04/18/i-dread-days-like-today/
Recently the thought of money keep getting to me. Not just like “how much should I spend/save” that kind of thoughts but more like the in depth and long term kind.
I feel the growing need for me to earn and spend my own money. Everything is about money these days. I see my dad getting old each day and this makes me find it more difficult to get money from him. But I want to do and buy a lot of things, which is impossible without money.
2 of them at the top of my “use my own money” priority list:
- Go overseas. My relatives recently asked me if I wanna go America with them WTF. (I wanted cause I haven’t really been to anywhere except for Malaysia. And Thailand, when I was still at the age where I couldn’t remember shit.) but I felt guilty about money if my dad were to sponsor me and told them I can’t go with them. Just accommodation and travel expenses cost more than $3000.
- Get a car license.
Yup. On top of that, there is my university course fees + misc fees, which is probably the biggest blood sucker in this 3 to 4 years.
May not sound like a big deal to you rich kids out there..
SIGH.
Posted by peironggg on March 22, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/03/22/money-money/
So I’ve gotten my result slip. It’s laying quietly on my study table, giving me that angry glare every time I look at it.
Okay that was an exageration, I didn’t do THAT badly. But it wasn’t great for sure.
I can’t say I regret not studying harder because I feel that even if I do, the results would come out about the same. I went in for Math paper feeling unusually prepared, and confident, but came out of the hall disappointed with how very tough it is. Then Physics, on the contrary, I went in quite unprepared, and came out pretty satisfied with my performance. And Econs, messed up paper even though I’ve been putting most effort in it through out the 2 years. As for GP and Lit, I guess it is more or less determined by your natural capabilities for English, not hard work.
Therefore, retaking A’levels as a private candidate will not be an option for me. If I can’t do it last year, what makes me think that I can do it this year? Not to mention, I have to self-study, which is a no no for people like me.
So what are my plans? I’m ruling out NUS and SMU because even if I do get in, most probably it will be a course that I’m not interested in.
I’ve checked the indicative grade profile for NTU, I think I’m eligible for some courses like engineering and design. I don’t think I wanna be an engineer in the future, so, design?? My dream job since a long while. The thought of drawing and doing interesting things rather than doing normal office assignments for work is attracting me to pursue it. However, design requires talent. And it will probably be harder for me to find a good job if I hold a degree for design instead of any normal business degree. On top of that, NTU only offers certain design courses that are more “product based”. I wanted interior design. Which leads me to another alternative.
SUTD. It is a new school thus no indication of any previous minimum grades. The school looks cool, maybe that is why I couldn’t really picture myself in it.
Okay last, and the most probable one, SIM. If I do choose SIM, it will be some normal business or management courses. Boring, but a wide enough job scope. But then again, its degree is not comparable to the previous two.
SO MY CONCLUSION?? MY CONCLUSION IS THAT I HAVE NO CONCLUSION. At least for now.
I’m gonna be spending some time here, thinking about what I really really want for myself.
Alright sorry for the wordy post. Great if you’ve read every word of it. 
Ending this post with a pic taken by my samsung. How very irrelevant! Haha!
Ciaos!
Posted by peironggg on March 5, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/03/05/64/
Tomorrow is the day I collect the third major result slip of my life.
The butterflies refuse to leave my stomach since this morning. They stop flying once in awhile but they never left. What if I don’t do well? No actually I know I won’t do well. So I should be asking, what if I do really badly? I wouldn’t mind Sim but what if I can’t even get in. WHAT IF….. So many what ifs.
Today my aunt called with good intentions to encourage me.
“Can one la. If people can, why can’t you?”
Ummm okay? I’ve been asking myself this question the whole fucking time I was in CJ. Why can’t I? Why can’t I get a B? Or even C? WHY CAN’T I PASS?
So, it seems like the scary thing about not doing well is not just that your future might not be as bright as planned, but the fact that relatives and friends will bombard you with questions about how well, or, how not well you’ve done. That’s when you admit that possibly you’re just not that smart.
I’ll probably avoid all teachers in school tomorrow.
If any teacher smiles at me tomorrow I will be too nervous to be able to decide if his/her smile is a sympathetic or joyful one.
Posted by peironggg on March 1, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/03/01/a-levels/
Let me introduce you to my baby:
A Samsung ex1!!
My very first semi-pro 
Maybe I’m not exactly in a very good position to give praises, but at least for my own needs, I think this baby is AWESOME.
I wanted something which gives me more control than my old camera, but at the same time an idiot-proof interface just in case I screw the manual part up. So yup, this camera does exactly that.
To add on, there is a freaking swivel AMOLED screen attached to its body. Which means, camwhoring is made much easier! Oh, and I especially like its ability to capture in low light since my old camera is only workable in presence of good lighting (Unless you use flash, but using it will black out everything that is not the subject).
Cons? Nothing that affects me too much till date.
Alright I’ll stop.
.
.
.
Goodbye old love who stuck with me for 5 years,
You served me… well.
Later!
Posted by peironggg on February 22, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/02/22/ive-upgraded-2/
Yesterday night I was talking to Crystal on Skype about how shallow friendship is becoming as we grow up. So before I actually fall asleep, I rolled on my bed thinking about what we’ve been talking about earlier on.
I don’t have much friends.
Why do people need so many friends? If you can make many new friends without sacrificing the closer bonds you’ve had, then good for you. But I don’t think it’s possible. I’m not talking about acquaintance because acquaintances and friends are obviously on different levels to begin with.
Friendship is a mutual thing. I may like you but if your attention for me is divided for the many other friends you have, most likely we can’t be close friends. It’s not a matter of being possessive or not because whether you like it or not, friendship (as much as relationship), requires time and effort for one to build up.
So, ultimately, it boils down to 2 choices in this aspect of our life– Few close friends, OR many friends on a rather superficial level.
Which would you choose?
Posted by peironggg on February 12, 2012
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2012/02/12/you-cant-have-both/
I’ve been using blogger for about six years now and it’s time to try something new. Besides, my old blog is as good as dead.
If you’ve found your way here, most likely you’ve been redirected through my old blog, which also means that you still read my blog? Haha ok fine no. The last time i blogged was about 4 months ago and the interval between every two posts is usually more than a month.
So, the reason why I’ve decided to rekindle my interest for blogging is that I’m seriously bored to tears. For the past 3 months I’ve been doing what I’ve always wanted to do– Waking up everyday without an alarm clock, then slowly doing whatever I feel like doing for the rest of the day (except for the few hours of the week for work). Sure I’m still appreciative for this long break but I feel quite unaccomplished.
I think it’s time I pick up a hobby. I like many things but there isn’t any that I think would be considered a hobby.
Any ideas? Sleeping and using computer don’t count.
Ok later folks.
Posted by peironggg on November 18, 2011
http://peironggg.wordpress.com/2011/11/18/hello-world/
